Friday, February 17, 2012

SWF seeking GOD: The Redeemer

So it is really late right now…2:31am to be exact and I find myself wide awake.  I figure what better thing to do with this time than to meditate on my Redeemer.  It took me a few tries to decide on which of His names I wanted to go with.  There are hundreds to choose from.  But in light of the passage I just read Redeemer won out.  I just read Hosea 7:11-16

“Ephraim is like a dove, easily deceived and senseless – now calling to Egypt, now turning to Assyria.  When they go, I will throw my net over them; I will pull them down like the birds in the sky.  When I hear them flocking together, I will catch them.  Woe to them, because they have strayed from me!  Destruction to them, because they have rebelled against me!  I long to redeem them but they speak about me falsely.  They do not cry out to me from their hearts but wail on their beds.  They slash themselves, appealing to their gods for grain and new wine, but they turn away from me.  I trained them and strengthened their arms but they plot evil against me.  They do not turn to the Most High; they are like a faulty bow.  Their leaders will fall by the sword because of their insolent words.  For this day will be ridiculed in the land of Egypt.”

I have been reading through Hosea in order to prepare for the upcoming Bible study I will be leading for the young women of my church.  When I got to this passage tonight I felt it resonate with me in a very palpable way.  I have found that being a theatrical and dramatic person is a wonderful gift, especially when it comes to reading scripture.  Being able to take words and inject emotions and life into them really can change your entire perspective on a passage.  Try imagining the wonder and awe of Creation as you read Genesis 1 and 2 out loud and see if you don’t look at grass and trees and the moon and sun just a little bit differently.  As I read these 6 verses I really began to taste the anguish woven into the words.  Allow me to paint a picture for you. 

The light from the crackling fire gave off an eerie glow to what should have been a warm and inviting scene.  He sat in the chair next to me gazing into the flames burning in front of us.  He hadn’t spoken in what seemed like an eternity, the crackle the only thing breaking the night’s silence.  I studied His face in the wavering glow.  The lines in His face were deep and professed the lack of sleep and pain.  The look in His eye was distant, the flame’s dance completely lost on the beholder.  I turned my attention back to the hearth as the silence reigned.  “She is like a dove, easily deceived and senseless.”  His hoarse voice cut the air, startling me.  “She turns this way for comfort.  She turns that way for love.  When she runs again I’m not letting her get away.  I will hold her here with all the strength I have in My body.” His voice faltered but His eyes glowed with a strength far surpassing their reflected embers.  “How dare she run from me?  There are consequences for the damage she causes.  She must be held accountable for her actions against me!” His gravel voice seemed to fill the room.  He clenched His fist several times then in a whisper that betrayed the tears just below the surface, “I want so desperately to take her in my arms and hold her and not let go, but she fights me at every turn, and spreads lies about me.” The passion and pain in His voice had me frozen in awe.  He loved her.  After all that she had done, He loved her still.  “I hear her at night sobbing into her pillow when she thinks I am not listening.  I am right there ready to embrace and to comfort her but she pushes me away every chance.” He looked down mournfully at His now open hands.  “What’s worse, she accepts comfort from others.  She runs to everyone but Me for her solace.”  He swallowed back a sob.  “I have given her everything!  All that I have is hers and she still tries to ruin me.  Everyone and everything she runs to will fail her.  They have failed her and still she hunts after them.”  He shook His head, not in disgust or mockery, but in pity.  How could such love exist?  This one who has refused Him at every turn, who has cheated on Him, who had greedily taken everything He has ever given with little to no appreciation or acknowledgement whatsoever, this one who did not even know the meaning of the word love, how could it be that He loved and pursued this creature so passionately?  The logs in the hearth had been reduced to mere embers, His words having seemingly stolen the fire from them.  He still loves her.

When I have read passages in the past where God is speaking as He does in Hosea of the consequences of sin I always read it as angry.  And I do believe that there is anger and pain when we sin against God.  The Bible makes it very clear that God does not turn a blind eye or shrug His shoulders when His children sin.  But the anger that is displayed time and time again is that of a parent or a jealous husband.  Let’s be honest here, people.  Most of us if not all of us don’t want to be held responsible for our actions and don’t want to think of God has having any right to be angry with us because hey we only are human.  When a wife cheats on her husband does the husband have any right to be angry?  Of course he does!  This woman who has vowed to love and honor him, who has pledged her faithfulness and support to him, who has made a covenant before God and man to forsake all others save him has destroyed every promise made.  When a child deliberately disobeys their parent and runs away, does the parent have a right to be upset? Absolutely!  This child who has been loved and cared for, who has been fed and clothed, who has been delighted in and shepherded has tossed aside all that as though it were worthless and gone out on his own because he can do it so much better.  Y’all, this is me!  This is you!  I am the wayward wife and the disobedient child!  Everything we have comes from the very hand of God and we throw it back in His face because we know better.  Or we snatch it from His hand greedily without as much as a “thank you”.  Why?  Because we don’t want Him cramping out style.  We don’t want to be told “no”.  Everything has to be our way!  Tonight as I read this passage my heart broke over my sin.  I am constantly trying to get everything I can from God without having to give anything in return.  I am always on the lookout for escapes so I can go back to doing my own thing without being tied down.  I push Him away because I don’t trust that He truly cares about me.  I throw tantrums when He tells me no.  I find my solace and my support and my drive in idols.  I worship the god of comfort and safety and happiness.  I fear the unknown.  Left to myself I am a wreck and a half.  But the glorious news is that He won’t leave me to myself.  He tells me no when I want Him to get away.  He pursues me with a passion that is incomprehensible.  He pulls me back every time I try to wrestle away from Him.  He listens to me when I think I am all alone.  He welcomes me back with open arms and redeems my broken heart and filthy hands.  He wipes my tears and He rejoices when I return to Him.  Why does He do all of these things?  Because He loves me!  Because He desires me!  Because I am His and He is mine!  Because He is merciful and gracious!  It has nothing to do with me.  It has nothing to do with what I can offer Him.  It has everything to do with who He is.  The Redeemer!

Hallelujah! God is at work!

TTFN~
REE