Thursday, May 26, 2011

"And The Hits Just Keep On Comin'..."

You know one of the annoying things about the way God works? When I have a weakness or sin that easily besets me, he tends to poke and prod at it in order to purge it from my system. He taps into all the insecurities, fears, and temptations I have to show me my sin and make me aware of the Holy Spirits working.  Almost immediately as I am made aware of a sin, the picking begins, hence, my current stage in life.I have recently discovered what a blessing and a curse it is to have such a swift working Holy Spirit. 

Specifically, the way God has been digging at me lately is to bring rejection in all areas.  I have always been the type of person to rely heavily on people for acceptance.  Growing up I was one of the popular kids that could get along with anyone and had friends in all social groups.  Friendships and acceptance just came easily to me so I didn't have to deal with a lot of rejection growing up.  Well that has changed for sure and the older I get the more and more people let me down.  Whether it is family not being there for me when I needed them, a boyfriend deciding, unexpectedly for some unclear reason, I am not "the one he should be with", a couple that I have had a seemingly intimate mentor-ship with continuing to deny me the welcoming and encouraging friendship that I have tried so hard to fabricate with them, or a close friend who now keeps me at arms length and avoids me after a misunderstanding that was resolved to the best of my ability.  God has been digging at my insecurities of rejection and "need" of people and their acceptance with these and many other scenarios.  It's like removing a big splinter.  I remember when I was little. I was a tom boy and was not a fan of shoes.  I would run around the yard (and still do) playing barefoot. Well several times this backfired on me and I would get a splinter.  I would dread them because I knew what came next.  Mama getting the needle and tweezers and she would spend what seemed like hours (really only a few minutes) digging and picking, trying to get that stupid thing out.  Back then I could never understand why it was good to go through all that pain to remove a splinter that didn't even really hurt anymore, as long as no one touched it.  It just didn't seem logical to me.  If it hurts you stop doing it. Isn't that what pain receptors were created for? Well this is obviously flawed logic as we see in surgeries and settings of broken bones. Now that I am older I understand that for the greater good of the whole body, parts must go through pain and discomfort sometimes.  The same goes for the soul.

I wonder, if I had really examined past needling, would the pain have been more bearable because I knew it was for a purpose?  Would I have squirmed and fought against the picking of my Father's hand had I understood that it was necessary for my sanctification and growth? Would my heart have less chunks missing? Probably. It has really opened my eyes to being far more self aware.  I need to focus on Christ and the purpose behind the discomfort and trials or I will just focus on the pain and self pity, which doesn't do anybody an ounce of good.   

Well by God's grace I am learning.  Although he continues to dig and prod I understand the purpose and I can see the good of it.  He is truly at work and I can see him slowly, bit by painful bit, getting the deeply embedded splinter to the surface.  Through the pain I am free to be thankful.  I am free to admit the hurt and I don't have to like it.  But I am also free to heal from those rejections and disappointments because I am justified in Christ and my Father is who I need acceptance from. I have that already and I have no way of losing it.  I don't need to impress him, he sees his Son when he looks at me and because Christ has imputed his righteousness to me, my virtue and worth are beyond compare. I don't need to be perfect, because it is not my perfection that gains his love, its his!  I don't need to fabricate a relationship with him, because he draws me to himself and encourages me and welcomes me into his loving arms.  And he is there for me every time I need him, which is hourly. 
What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:31-39
That's the Gospel! Thanks be to God! He is at work!
TTFN
Rach~

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Kick off to Life After College

I am a college graduate! I can hardly believe that I have finally reached this milestone! On one hand it seems like it took forever and then on the other hand, I can hardly believe that time has flown so fast.  Who would have thought that the little girl with tears in her eyes struggling over her homework would finally get to this point? Only God, that's who. I am so thankful that he sustained me through those spelling tests, that math homework, all the way to the philosophy and psychology exams that got me to this point.  It feels so good to be on this side of college :)

We made it!
It was so awesome to be able to graduate with my cousins too. It was so fun to have them to share the day with! As you can see from the picture my uncle was pretty proud of all 3 of us :)



The very next day I was in a crowded van with a bunch of my closest friends headed to RUF Summer Conference 2011!!! It was awesome!! It was a week full of the Gospel, which equals a beautiful week, whether it was at in Panama City, Florida or not.  Our large group speaker Richie Sessions was absolutely phenomenal.  He illustrated who Christ really is in relationship to me in a whole new and dynamic way.  He really nailed home the brotherhood of Christ and what that really means to us. As soon as they get the audios up for those sermons I will post them here.  There was so much information and points I would never be able to do them justice. They were so good!!

Waiting for Large Group to start
RUF Lynchburg also got the Semi-finals of the volleyball tournament! Our team was awesome and we went up against some really hard hitters! Literally! I was so proud of our team and how we came together and got so far. It was quite exciting and it was great to get back on the court, I was pretty rusty so I know I definitely should not wait so long in between games for sure.  But it was such a good feeling and the soreness that followed was definitely earned.

Warming up

In heat of the moment

Eyes on the target
Even though we didn't win the championship RUF Lynchburg did not leave empty handed by any means.  We did win the sand building contest! Finally RUF Lynchburg is making herself known as a force to be reconed with. The theme was Pop Culture, well Marc had his heart set on doing a life size bathroom so this is what ensued...
We are so mature...

Working hard to make Marc vision a reality

We had faucets, towels, toilet paper, and even bubbles in the tub!

Why yes it is life size
So our Emcee for the week was totally obsessed with John Travolta. It was quite funny.  Well we wanted to make sure we were in line with Pop Culture in some way so this is what our genius Ben came up with...

Travolta's John, FTW!
It was such a good time for hanging out with awesome people in an awesome location.  A lot of love flowed freely and it was a beautiful time of growing in my understanding of the Gospel and community.

Getting some lovin from Caroline
God's provision is a precious thing and just when I need it the most he shows me he still has my back.  I still have no idea what is ahead of me.  I have some big decisions in the works and I have a lot of changes that are in store that will require even more growing up, but that is the process of life. I will have a separate post on what God has specifically been teaching me later but I thought I would get the fun and light updates taken care of now :)

TTFN
Rach~